Every time I look at the script, there's always something new. A new reason, a new motivation, a new joke, a sarcastic remark that I didn't notice before. Of course, they're never new, just recently discovered by me. At first, I look at the script as one bulk of words. Can you say INTIMIDATING? But then I started to break it down into smaller parts, and analyzed them bit by bit, and I feel less scared by it all. Since that helped me to get to know the play, I feel that it's more do-able, although I can't deny I still feel quite lost and puzzled sometimes.
I'm eager to explore my character, but like I mentioned during rehearsals, holding the script actually holds me back. And this being a wordy play, plus the fact that the Director is, very particular about each word being right, I hold on to the script like my life depends on it. So learning my lines would be a great help. And the sooner I do that, the more I get to explore Melibea/Isabelle/Hyppolyta.
When I get into a production, I'm always humbled by the people I meet. And this production is no exception. Their talent, their willpower, their lack of fear to try out new things...they're all beautiful things to experience and observe.
Sometimes I think theatre is just a way for us to be kids again. To strip down all those years of fear and self-inhibition imposed on us through formal education, family, friends. I've lived more than two decades, somewhat neglecting myself, saying that society is more important than me. Well, not anymore, I'm gonna explore myself like a kid again. :)
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Explore yourself like a kid again? Naughty naughty...
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